Choosing Love In the Crossfire
It’s
a dark day. Darkness encroaches at every turn. If darkness had its way, it
would devour every living thing in its path. There are days when I sit on the
carpet floor cupping hot tea in my hands and a wave of sadness passes through
me, like dusty wind on a cloudy day. I feel as if the darkness is taking over the
little light and fresh air that’s left in this place. But then God reminds me
to stand up and fight – not with human weapons, but with the weapons of prayer
and music that brings His love to a loveless place.
Whenever I grab my ukulele and
sing His songs, or when I cry out in simple words that make up a prayer of the
spirit – I feel the fog and darkness clear. And again, my eyes are opened to see
who the real enemy is! We are not called to be on the defensive against the
darkness of evil; we are called to be on the offensive with the light we carry.
Darkness cannot have its way when the Light-carriers are standing tall – bold
warriors who hold the keys to Hope and Life.
But
still, there are dark days to contend with.
What
do you say when your student tells you that he can't bear to play music today
because his friend's brother is the journalist who perished in the twin
bombings in Barchi yesterday because he was one of the first to arrive on the scene
to make a live report... The attack is an absolute evil. It targeted a sports center
and then the second bomb targeted the first responders and journalists who
arrived early at the scene. On this day I
steel myself with the thought that we are playing music for our very lives; and
the truth is that some days we simply cannot play, simply because we are so
sad. Still, I know that tomorrow, we will play again – because these melodies
are some of the only and smallest beauties in a place torn apart by war.
Reports of casualties in this unpredictable
mine field are always surreal to digest when they are happening in the very
city you live in. With the twin bombings that happened yesterday, there are
those who died because they happened to be there and they were targeted for
their ethnicity. And then there are those, like the brave journalist Samim
Faramarz, who died because they chose to go there – specifically – knowing it
was a scene of death and destruction and danger.
Bravery is a bright choice you make in the
dark when fear and evil threatens to devour you and your world.
It usually amazes me how okay I am in the
face of all this. It is the grace that God gives me in a tough environment. But
it still pains me to see those I know who are affected because they’re being
targeted. They are losing their lives for nothing –
the victims of someone else’s warped
agenda and ideology, and nobody cares.
I ask myself: Is there a way to fight back? Will more
soldiers or weaponry help? Security? Aid? Could non-violent resistance work in
such a place? Will music, education, art help at all in the long run?
I know the answer. But I will not say it, I will live it
out.
[Cover
Photo by Janielle, 2018: Helicopters heading to or from war-zones in
the country often fly over where I live. I took this photo recently when
the sun was setting upon the mountains and the moon was slowly making
its ascent.]
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